hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
We just shotgunned beers for America
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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