Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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