Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
