Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
should my penis look like a turkey
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
