The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
