Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
