i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
