Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
