ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Screwed.edu
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
