That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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