i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
