U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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