girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
