its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
