How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
