We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
