Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
