Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
