This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
