After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Of course I have a pirate flag
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
