I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
