how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
