I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
