I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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