she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize