she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
