I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize