He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
