I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize