my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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