so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
