every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize