There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
