The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
