): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
