She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Even my vagina gasped.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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