Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Randomize
