talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I met the friendliest cop last night
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
