How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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