drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
