Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
