Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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