i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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