I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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