Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Mom said you looked used
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
