Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
