glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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