just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I looked at my own cervix.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize