Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I skipped work to stalk him.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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