He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
